Embracing ‘They’
For some of you, you might not have any idea that I am trans at all. Others might know this very well and understand the importance and journey I have taken. However, this time since we’re in Trans Awareness Month I think its time to give you a little potted history. Not overly long but maybe, just maybe there’s someone out there who needs to hear it.
I’ve known from an early age that I felt like an ‘alien’ in society. I never fully fit into a neat pocket of one particular type of people. I’ve always carefully careened around the edges and watched with a curious eye. I think its one of my favourite things to do. Not because I want to be, more because I’m just a curious person in general.
Through time, I started to piece together really who I was. I realised my gender didn’t fit how I was assigned at birth (trans) and I didn’t just fall into heterosexual attraction according to that role (queer). I also had to unplug and reset how I related to other people too through my own mental health crashing. Another thing: trans people are more prone to mental health issues. Accordingly to a 2012 Bath University survey, more than half of us are likely to suffer with depression.
Once I got a better idea of myself, I realised sharing parts of my journey and my listening skills and my inate introspection found me becoming a self awareness coach (among other things). I’m still growing, learning and adjusting to things in this part of the world but I’m also learning more about myself, especially the non-binary part.
Embracing being non-binary is still a matter of contention as outside and inside the LGBTQ community there is a stigma of being ‘trendy’ rather than realising non-binary/gender non-conforming people have been around not just for a while, but been around for thousands of years. Also, being trans is also growing from what it once was. Its no longer patterned as an affliction that needs to be ‘fixed’ just another state of being as much as the media tries to paint us all under one villainous cloud.
If anything, being referred to with ‘they’ pronouns is way easier than binary ones. I used to use it hundred of times a day when I worked in a call centre and no one blinked an eye. Now, its changed just a little, making room for a ‘singular’ they. As usual people will complain, then they’ll get used to it. Hopefully to stop more trans lives being lost, I’ll be waiting for that day in belief it will come.
Until next time, #embraceinfinity
